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Driving home from my in-laws a few weeks ago Cole asked the question, “Where are all the goats?”

Hey dude! Nice fur-goat!

Now, this might seem a common question if you regularly pass by a farm or a field where you see the the odd grazer. But we were driving through the buzzing metropolis of Mtubatuba. (Okay, slight exaggeration. Mtuba has one stop sign and one petrol (gas) station and its claim to fame is that Brad Pitt visited for an AIDS project as it has one of the highest infection rates in the world… but I digress) When Cole was worried about the missing goats it was because there are normally a dozen or so goats standing around tied to trees ready to be purchased for the latest celebration of lobola (marriage dowry), wedding or even to slaughter for a funeral. But today there were no goats to be bought and Cole –our animal lover- was distraught!

It's a goatieback, not a piggyback!

I decided it might not be a good idea to stroll down the street to look at the local market where the sangomas (witch doctors) go to buy their ingredients to make their muti (traditional medicine) in case we find remnants of the goats in question. You will, however, find ingredients such as animal livers, monkey tails, hair from a baboon, etc. for your latest soup to make your secret crush fall in love with you.

It’s experiences like these when I wonder, how will my boys adjust to living back in the States again? I’ve had to learn the different vocab for simple kid games like catch. Instead of “You’re it!” you say, “You’re on!” and “You can’t (pronounced caahhhn’t) tag me, I’m in DEN” den=base. I’ve almost forgotten that it isn’t common to have kids shout out, “Mum! The monkeys are in our kitchen again!”

Monkey in our backyard

And children running around the shopping centers, libraries and schools without shoes is expected. Last time we were in the States my eldest warned his American friend not to go too close to the lake because there are hippos and crocodiles! I didn’t have the heart to tell him the only thing in there is a pretty little rainbow trout or maybe a couple of bullfrogs!

It’s not just their experiences…it’s their accents. It now sounds normal when they tell me, “Mum, you mustn’t rush to drop us at school-jaaa, we will be there just now. Not to worry” or “Mum, don’t forget my tackies in my gym kit, hey!” not to forget “I only like marmite saarmies with cheese, not bovril!”

Though they were both born in the USA, it seems I’m raising two true South Africans.

Howzaaaaat BOOEEETIE!

6 Comments | In: All about the kids, Moyamuhle | tags: Africa, Brad Pitt, Cole, Goats, Mtubatuba, Sangoma. | Author Archives: Moyamuhle

After my post Let’s get focused several people asked me which books I had been reading to help me to focus. I wanted to add the titles here with links back to Amazon in case anyone wants to actually buy the books. Personally I find it difficult to find the time to actually get to a bookstore and browse around! I love the fact that I can do much of my shopping online and just get my new products shipped to me (within 10-15 working days hah!). Plus… We actually get a slight kickback, so please when you need to purchase something on Amazon, come visit us first. Click away!

Hardcore Zen: Punk Rock, Monster Movies, & the Truth about Reality is a great book about Zen Buddhism written in a way that “normal” people can relate to. The author, Brad Warner, does a great job of speaking at my level. Now, I’m an educated woman but when it comes to Buddhism I’m a newbie. And I appreciate his approach. The book was easy to read and every chapter seemed to hit me with a punch in the gut… “read that sentence again! remember what it’s saying!”

A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose (Oprah’s Book Club, Selection 61) is one that Oprah has recommended to the world. Seriously… she had online course and many many shows on the topic. This one was not as easy of a read as Hardcore Zen but it is quite engaging. I also found a number of “aha!” moments in this book.

Next books on my list (which I’ve already purchased yay):

• The Tao of Pooh - classic!
• American Nerd: The Story of My Peoplee - hehe this was a gift, telling isn’t it?
• Sit Down and Shut Up: Punk Rock Commentaries on Buddha, God, Truth, Sex, Death, and Dogen’s Treasury of the Right Dharma Eye - The sequel to Hardcore Zen
• This Is Your Brain on Music: The Science of a Human Obsession

Do you have any good books you recommend? Have you read the ones listed here?

1 Comment | In: Jennita, Recommendations | tags: focus, oprah, recommended books, zen buddhism. | Author Archives: Jennita

Most people are aware that this is a Presidential election year, and that the Democratic National Convention is taking place right here in Denver, Colorado. I have been excited for it, but it really hadn’t sunk in until tonight. It’s not JUST that the DNC is in our neck of the woods, but that the fact that I’m actually proud of our candidate Barack Obama.

Tonight I worked for about 4 hours making signs for the convention at the United Food and Commercial Workers Union. Initially I did it because I was told that if I helped make signs I would get a ticket to see Barack’s acceptance speech next week (Woot!!). When I first got there, I wasn’t prepared for the amount of people who were busily working. Staple… staple… staple! Chatter… chatter… chatter! There was an actual buzz in the room. Everyone seemed to have a job, and they were quite happy doing it.

I jumped right into the humming of the room and got to work. My job: fill trash bags with 25 signs each, then tie the bag, and finally add a yellow sticker to either side. Done. Then start all over again! At first I was a bit shy because it seemed that everyone else already had their place… their role in the system. I’m not very good at being a newbie, I like to be a part of it and become an expert! Luckily the task at hand wasn’t too daunting ;). In no time I was moving around the room, gathering up signs and trying my best to not lose count.

I imagine that everyone was there for different reasons. Some were volunteering because they wanted to be a part of something great. Others were there because the Union was paying $10/hour (they also provided food… well Taco Bell if you call that food). Many were talking about all the different things going on this weekend and upcoming week. And there were at least 3-4 different languages being spoken!

As I moved on to my next job of stapling two posters together (one side said “Obama” the other read “Unity”), I realized that I was a part of something greater. My simple task of staple, staple, staple, flip(!) was going to mean something to the 70,000 people who will be attending the acceptance speech as well as the thousands watching on TV. These very simple signs, mean Hope and Change for many Americans.

Those two words kept ringing in my ears as I worked away. I started to wonder what the world will be like when Eva is 5 years old… how about 15… what about 35? There’s no doubt that the world will have changed by then, but will this time right now, right here, actually make a change for the positive? Can Barack Obama be the change that I am hoping for? Will his presidency impact Eva’s future? Or am I hoping for too much?

Following are a couple of my favorite YouTube! Videos:

Barack Obama - Reggaeton Style

Flobots - Rise

The Flobots are a local band that has recently hit the national and even international scene. I love the message in this song. It makes me want to get up off my butt and do something!

Take a press tour of Invesco Field at Mile High where Obama will accept the Democratic nomination for the Presidency.

4 Comments | In: Jennita, Politics | tags: barack obama, democratic national convention. | Author Archives: Jennita

When you have so many things going on in one day, how do you stay focused? And by focus, I mean how do you keep from losing control of everything, when you’re so busy? And how do you make sure you don’t lose yourself in the whole process? It’s so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind that is daily life that you forget to actually live and enjoy it.

What about being mentally focused? This is definitely something I struggle with. I lead such a busy life (as most people I know do…) that I find it difficult to stay on track. I’m constantly thinking about everything I need to get done at work, everything I need to do with and for Eva, all the things I want to do for myself, and worrying about money and time constraints. The list really could go on and on, but I won’t bore you with the nitty gritty.

When I lay down at night, my brain seems to kick into overdrive. I start thinking about how I need to find a better brand of diapers, because the ones we use now leak. I remember that I need to take my leased car to the dealership for a tune up. I realize that I forgot to call my grandmother back. I remember the fact that I have to give a presentation tomorrow and I haven’t prepared for it at all because I’ve been “focused” on other things. Then there’s the biggest question of all… If I myself can’t stay focused and keep my mind clear, how do I show/teach Eva?

Clear mind is like the full moon in the sky. Sometimes clouds come and cover it, but the moon is always behind them. Clouds go away, then the moon shines brightly. So don’t worry about clear mind: it is always there. When thinking comes, behind it is clear mind. When thinking goes, there is only clear mind. Thinking comes and goes, comes and goes, You must not be attached to the coming or the going.
—Zen Master Seung Sahn

So what’s my plan? Well I’m working on it. I know that I need to let go of the things I can’t change, and focus on the things that matter. I added the quote above because I really think that Zen Buddhism makes a lot of sense. Although I may never find Enlightenment, I would sure be happy to quiet my brain down a bit and get rid of some of the clutter. I’m reading a few books that are helping me (or should I say that I am using to help myself) to let go of the past, and not fret about the future. The moment is now. I might as well live it to the fullest.

This is really the only way that I can see myself being a good mom. If I myself can learn to live in the moment and be happy with life NOW as opposed to the way it was, or the way it could be… then I’m setting my daughter up to be one stable, happy woman.

How do you keep focused?

6 Comments | In: All about MOM, Jennita | tags: clear mind, focus, mom, thinking, zen buddhism. | Author Archives: Jennita

Now that I’ve been a pseudo-mom to two kids this week (see post) it brings me to another topic…how many more? I feel so happy and content with my two kiddos. I have an arm for each. Many people, including my dear hubby, ask, “But don’t you want a GIRL!” With my first pregnancy I was certain I was carrying a boy. Voila! I was right! The second time I was convinced I was having a girl. And? Out popped the most gorgeous of boys! Haha I’ve never felt that I needed one of each. I was just plain thrilled to have two gorgeous healthy kids. So do I need a third? I change my mind every other day. All three of my boys (that would be the two kids and one husband) agree we need one more.

Playgroup - Kieran (10 months) is second from left

Some people don’t enjoy the baby stage. I even loved being pregnant—but I won’t go there cause I’m afraid of hate-mail. I’m lucky to love everything about babies including their smell, the cuddles and even the night-time feedings. It’s such a special time. I get broody when I see other babes. But I have also seen how much of my attention was used up by having four. It’s hard to spread yourself around and I don’t want to deprive my two boys of their mom time, not to mention time for the hubby too. So do I want more? I know I should be taking into consideration many factors like financially are we able? is it feasible with having to travel so much? Really, my decision will come from my heart. Many folks have told me “you’ll just know”. But it’s been five years since I was last pregnant and I still don’t know!

9 Comments | In: All about MOM, Moyamuhle | tags: kids, mom. | Author Archives: Moyamuhle

I recently had the luxury of going on a vacation with my husband, but without my kids. Our very own time-out. It was a much needed break. My sister spent the week with the kids while we went to Jamaica. It was great. A much needed time to recharge. Don’t get me wrong I love my kids and love being a mom, but for me to be a good mom, I need my own time too. Not to mention that my husband and I needed some time just to ourselves so we could “reconnect”. With a move coming up and living the past six months in limbo of not knowing exactly when we will be moving, our relationship has become a little strained. I’m the type of person who PLANS everything. So this state of “not knowing” has been killing me. But now we are back from our vacation and back to reality. So we continue to clean and touch up the house so it’s ready to go on the market when my husband gets his final job offer.

3 Comments | In: All about MOM, MotherT | | Author Archives: MotherT

As I said in my bio—I’m a great lover of blogs, but this is actually my first proper blog post! I’ve done nothing more than comment on others so I would have to say it is time for me to “put it all out there” and let others have their say about mine! Why not just jump right in. I’m sure you guys will all be kind and gentle with a newbie like me. Right? Here goes:

We’ve had two additions to our household this afternoon. I’ve gone from two children to four children…in the blink of an eye! A friend of ours is in Mozambique with her hubby—and I, being the very *best* of people, offered to have her kids. So far, everything is going really smoothly! Did I mention it has only been 45 minutes? In those 45 minutes one of the children has 1. Declared himself BORED 2. Asked where all the toys are (I pointed in the direction of the playroom where you can’t see the floor for all the toys!) and 3. Tells me his mum let’s him eat chocolate spread on bread everyday for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Should be a great week! Let’s get started.

My plan this week is to be organized. I’m sure organization is the secret to having more than 2 kids. I have every intention of getting their school lunches ready the night before, picking out the clothes for the morning ahead of time and having two simultaneous baths (luckily our house has two tubs!). For those of you reading this who already have more than two kids, you can stop laughing now. Where’s the love?! I realize I’m gonna have to learn along the way. Just hope the learning curve isn’t too steep…I don’t have that much time! Wish me luck.

You know, I would classify myself as a good Mom…maybe even a great mom. But a great mom to two kids. I’ve been asked, grilled and even begged by my family, friends and husband to have a third child. I think this little experiment might aid me in my decision. (But that is for another post!)

Cheersxx

2 Comments | In: All about MOM, Moyamuhle | tags: friends, mom, play dates. | Author Archives: Moyamuhle

Baby with remote

We come in all shapes and sizes, come from many different backgrounds, and take various life paths. But the one thing we will always have in common… is that we’re moms! And although our lives our busy and we don’t even live in the same cities (or continents for that matter!), technology keeps us together.

Technology simply is a way of life these days. For the most part, I’m quite thankful for it. First of all, I’m a software developer, so I make a living from technology. My blackberry is pretty much attached to my hip, and I can be reached via phone, email, IM, text, Twitter and Facebook all from the one device, at any time of the day! And when I was pregnant I got weekly updates on how my baby was growing/forming from babycenter.com. Since one of my best friends (Moyamuhle) currently lives in South Africa, and another (MotherT) is about to move to Washington D.C., I need to keep up-to-date with any and all forms of communication.

I have noticed though that we are definitely raising a little techie girl. When my daughter gets fussy and is in need of a distraction, the best form is usually a TV remote or cell phone. She also quite enjoys banging on the laptop as well. She absolutely loves buttons! She even called her father the other day, AND got him on speaker phone (mmm hmm 10 months old). Of course as soon as he answered she proceeded to taste the phone. Somehow she thinks cell phones and remotes are tasty… who knows? Maybe they taste like chicken! Ahh and my sweet little girl already has her own ipod, filled with various types of children’s music. I wonder… are we setting her up to be technologically advanced, or are we setting ourselves up to always have to buy her the newest gadgets? eek…

No Comments | In: All about MOM, Jennita | tags: blackberry, facebook, mom, technology, twitter. | Author Archives: Jennita